Surely, these health updates of mine are getting old and tired. Like me.

I should put a “is dead/not yet dead” status message somewhere and leave it at that. I don’t have the will to add a current health status/statistic “widget” thing, either. Widgets, by the way, are a classic textbook example of someone not understanding internet technology enough to realize the outcome of their actions. Hey, I may be out of shape but I’m still critical and feisty.

My Wii Fit arrived on Wednesday and I’ve been playing with it. It’s vicious. It also indicates I am obese according to my body weight and that I better play some fucking Wii Fit or I will die choking on my own neck. Wii Fit takes no friends, gives no quarter. Wii Fit is a machine that will run you into the ground. It insulted me for missing a day. It told me that I have no balance. And now I’m here with a few minutes of Wii Fit under my belt and I can attest to several things.

• Like a lot of Miyamoto’s later creations, Wii Fit showers you with expansions and rewards as you play. It rewards you for getting a few minutes done every day. it rewards you for playing better. It rewards you for trying a variation of a game with a new offered variation. In the beginning, you feel like a guy just blowing through the expansions: hooray! I stood and didn’t fall over! But I’m sure this is a plan that’s proven to work, so they do it. (I felt the same way about Mario Galaxy, that snuggled you with gifts through the beginning and then it starts to give you the hate way down the line.)
• I had forgotten how little control I have over my own legs. 10 years of gout and kidney stones have removed my fine control; absolutely removed it. My mind and habits have adapted to “your legs suck” and so I had a blind spot about it, but this thing utterly shows me how much I’ve let them go.
• This is a beautifully designed piece of equipment. It is subtle, it is functional, it is clean. It goes nicely under my television when I’m not using it, and it doesn’t seem out of place for anything. Combined with the wireless aspect, and how it constantly turns itself off when not used, it’s just a great addition to the room.

I went through the orientation for my CPAP/Mask Breathy thing, and got a nice little model, and I have started sleeping with it. Right now probably 60-70 percent of my sleeping time is going on wearing it (this is normal, it takes some time to ramp up and sometimes I flop down for a nap without moving to put on the mask). I can’t report any major differences yet, but now that little guy’s on the job.

I am still on a pill regimen for blood acid level and blood pressure.

I still have my nice gym membership (and the Wii simply removes the “but the gym is closed” excuse).

So between all this, I have all the tools at my disposal to get in better health. I have no excuse. I also don’t want to fill this weblog with much more “guess what I am working out and wearing a mask” entries unless there’s either something enormously entertaining or if a few months down the like I look like a fashion model. Otherwise, just to let you know, I’m still chugging along that road and am vaguely planning for significant archival-doing time for the forseable future.

When I get hit by a truck six months from now, I intend to be in awesome shape.

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